Letters To My Hypnobirthing Teacher

This is an email exchange between myself and the hypnobirthing course leaders. If you've just stumbled across this page, please read this blog post first

MY FIRST LETTER

Hi Sue*,

Hope you're well and had a lovely Christmas. I'm so sorry to have to do this, I've been in two minds about whether to feed back or not to you (and also whether to write an honest blog post on it) because I know this will be disappointing but unfortunately the course not only didn't work for me but I feel set me up for a fall. I felt in the immediate aftermath of my birth (and still feel) very angry towards the Wise Hippo programme. I had a very long labour with an induction and felt like an absolute failure because I didn't have the hypnobirth that the course made me believe that I could have.

The wise hippo programme led me to believe that the baby would come when it was ready, that I should trust nature to deliver my baby. I was still quoting from the W H programme when the doctor told me that my stillbirth risk was sky rocketing. I ended up going 16 days overdue. It's my biggest regret and I feel that although the idea is to empower women to make their own decisions, it actually encouraged me to go against midwife and doctor's advice and contributed to the experience that I had. I feel that the course was so focus on a spontaneous labour and discouraged all intervention so I refused stretch and sweeps too and didn't allow the midwife to try that until 12 days overdue after much convincing and a stern talking to from the midwife.

I put my all into hypnobirthing, listened to the MP3s religiously, regularly watched water births on TV and shut out any 'negative' birth stories. The model birth that hypnobirthing sells just wasn't possible for me and I actually think the course is quite irresponsible teaching women to go so far over their due dates, with no mention of the fact that the reason that they induce is because research shows that the placenta becomes less effective the longer you go. They induce at 12 days overdue to save babies lives. I was lucky. I fear that somebody else might not be, a baby will die and I feel a strong desire to warn other mums-to-be about the risks of refusing induction.

The wise hippo course also made me fearful of drugs with suggestions that you will slow the baby down by taking drugs and as a result you're more likely to need intervention. I understand that in a textbook spontaneous natural labour this may encourage people to go without drugs for the better. My labour lasted over 30 hours, I did not sleep for 40 hours. An epidural or some pain relief may have given me the chance to rest to cope better with the birth.

When we did go in for the induction at 40+14 I looked up inductions in the W H course book, hoping that there would be some information or techniques to help me cope. All I found was discouragement. I felt guilty, that the baby would not have the best birth because I was going against nature. I remember the course talking of a domino effect, that women that have an induction are more likely to need an assisted birth, I believe this is a case of twisting the facts to make women believe that intervention at the birthing stage is avoidable by refusing inductions.

I am sorry that I feel so angry towards the WH programme, it's nothing personal, I know that you are just teaching the course but I suppose I am writing this because I don't want what happened to me to happen to someone else. I have a beautiful little girl thanks to a big team of doctors and midwives acting quickly to get a distressed and over-cooked baby out. Ten weeks on I can absolutely focus on that but in the aftermath of the birth I could only focus on my anger towards hypnobirthing making me believe that if I just worked hard enough, relaxed, sniffed enough clary sage and waited long enough I could have the birth that I wanted. I felt like a failure. Not because of the intervention, I knew that it had saved our lives, I had no anger towards the birth that I had, just towards hypnobirthing closing my eyes to the realities of the birth that I was destined to have at 40+16. I don't think there are such things as negative birth stories, just stories of amazing doctors getting babies out that would otherwise have died. I know that the course helps women stay calm during pregnancy and labour, that's a great thing and I know a few people that it's worked for, but they all went into spontaneous labour. My midwife told me she had never seen a hypnobirth work for a woman, another said that she had but never for a first baby.

This email is not designed to upset you, but because someone recently told me about a friend whose baby died at 40+14 and that could have very easily been me. I feel so stupid for putting my baby at risk because of a course based on idealised natural labours. There were a few elements of the course that I did use which helped, mostly the breathing techniques, and remaining calm throughout the labour. The couples element was good too, spending time as a couple focusing on the birth of our baby.

I know that the course content is not up to you so would you please pass my feedback on to the person that designs the programme, I feel a really strong desire to warn other couples about the dangers of going overdue and I would appreciate a response from them.

Thanks Sue and please don't think this reflects on you, you were really kind and caring throughout.

Nicola


OUR TEACHER'S RESPONSE

Hi Nicola

Thank you for your feedback.
I'm so sorry you feel like this about the course in general - it's the first time in 9yrs I have had anyone come back and feel that they failed & the information they received let them down/set them up to fail.

I have, as you requested, sent your email through to Dany Griffiths who created the course programme. She and Tamara are busy training midwives this week, but she has responded to me to say she has received your email & she will respond to you in due course.

Once again I'm sorry you feel so let down by the programme and found very little use of it. But thank you for letting me know.
I hope if you haven't already, or already been offered it, you can debrief with a Midwife.

Kind regards

Sue* 


RESPONSE FROM DANY-THE COURSE CREATOR


Dear Nicola

As requested Sue* has passed on your feedback with regards to your experience of using The Wise Hippo Birthing Programme.

Before I respond to your concerns I would like to say that I am sorry that you have had an upsetting experience and that you feel it is down to your antenatal education with The Wise Hippo.

What you are sharing with me in relation to your perception of what you are taught however is not congruent to the philosophy and teaching of the programme itself. Sue* herself gave me her comments in relation to your thoughts because she felt she needed to reassure me that she was teaching the programme correctly. 

The Wise Hippo philosophy is in fact to support women in having ‘the right birth on the day’. The reason this is our philosophy is because I am sure you will agree with me, it is impossible to promise women any one particular way of birthing. Life throws us curved balls sometimes doesn’t it and no amount of practice and preparation can avoid that from happening.

We actually have a number of NHS Trusts teaching The Wise Hippo Birthing programme because of this philosophy. In fact some of these Trusts are teaching The Wise Hippo Birthing Programme as their only form of antenatal education.  

I am sure that you will agree that if we were teaching women to go against the advice of their midwives and doctors that these NHS Trusts would not be prepared to teach it. We also state in the book that none of what we are teaching is medical advice and that they should always discuss any concerns with their medical caregivers. 

To be clear though let me explain what I mean by ‘the right birth on the day’.

Having ‘the right birth on the day’ means that women and their partners have the confidence to ask questions about any aspect of their labour and birth both beforehand and during. They then make decisions that are right for them based on the answers they receive, which means that they are the ones in control of their birth experience, rather than feeling like decisions were made without them fully understanding why. 

Now when I say that they are in control this doesn’t mean that everything will necessarily be perfect, because of course that would be impossible to control wouldn’t it? What I mean is having emotional control because sometimes we have to accept that birth needs help and we are very lucky to have medical professionals to support us with that aren’t we? 

But having a very clear understanding of why something is being suggested and then making the decision to accept that, is not only empowering but it stops women feeling like the decisions about their baby’s birth was taken away from them, as many sadly do and it is widely reported as a big reason why women feel traumatised by their baby’s birth. 

However, just because a woman has ‘the right birth on the day’, doesn’t mean that she may not be upset about not getting her perfect birth that she has worked so hard for. Disappointed that she didn’t get one of those beautiful births that go completely to plan. Why wouldn’t she feel angry about that? But because this cannot be avoided we do not tell women that they can have a perfect birth, in fact we make them aware that these tools are there to support them should their birth plans need to change. 

We most certainly do not TELL women what to do. 

We share with women how their body works during labour but we don’t say it is wrong to use pain relieving drugs. We don’t talk about the drugs because we are not medically trained to do so. 

We share how the brain interprets pain because this is useful for understanding how the mind works in relation to managing it. We don’t promise a pain free birth because we can’t. 

When talking about birth planning we point out that whilst it is useful to consider the things that are important for you that this is not a document carved in stone. That it is flexible and that every woman will choose at any point, based on what is happening, to change her mind about any of it if she so wishes. This includes whether or not she wants to take pain relieving drugs. during labour or accept something that maybe she had felt previously that she didn’t want to do. 

But as I said previously making informed decisions is key to feeling emotionally in control of what is happening which is why we teach B.R.A.I.N.S. in class 4. B.R.A.I.N.S. isn’t about going against advice, it is about making sure that advice is understood and is the right course of action for you to be taking. It is emphasised that this is what is right for you, not what we think you should do, or anyone else for that matter. 

We do not tell women not to accept induction. We point out that different doctors have different opinions about when the best time for induction is (not all doctors will induce at 40 plus 12) and that each couple should have a conversation and do their research in order to make a decision that is right for them. I think you will agree that if I felt women should never accept induction that I wouldn’t have put together a ‘preparing for induction’ session. Something that I believe Sue always tells her clients about at the end of her courses. 

With regards to a midwife saying that she has never seen a hypnobirth work for a first time mum then I will respectfully say that this is just the experience of this one midwife, combined with what she is interpreting as hypnobirthing working. I acknowledge that traditional hypnobirthing focusses solely on a natural birth without drugs. 

As I have explained though this is not the approach of The Wise Hippo. That said my birth story is in the book and as you will read I had a pain free home birth in 4 hours 20 mins with my first and only child. I was 39 at the time and was 41 weeks pregnant. My midwife said that watching my birth had restored her faith in midwifery. We have 100’s of stories of births like this from first time mums.

However, we also share stories of women who have transferred in from a home birth, who decided to have an epidural because that was the right decision for them, had intervention including requiring an emergency C-section because their particular birth had one of those curve balls thrown at it. 

We share all of these stories because from my point of view the success comes from a woman maintaining emotional control of her birth experience and feeling like she made all the right decisions based on the information that she was given at the time. 

As I said at the beginning of this email I am sorry that you are feeling angry because you have taken a different message away from your course but 1,000’s of other women have not interpreted the learning in the same way you have. I hope the information that I have provided and the fact that NHS midwives have gained agreement to teach the programme in their Trusts (which is no mean feat), will reassure you that we are most definitely not telling women what to do and we are absolutely not telling them to go against medical advice. 

We are teaching women facts about their mind and body and how they function during labour and giving them tools to support them working at their best.

We are also teaching women to ask questions and make decisions that are right for themselves and their babies. 

If you would like to discuss any of this further please let me know.

Best wishes

Dany Griffiths
Co-founder and Creative Director
The Wise Hippo Ltd.


I REPLIED


Hi Dany, 

I'm finally writing back to you to try to explain myself more clearly. Reading your letter at the time was very difficult for me and as you can imagine did not help my mental state and your words have hung like a cloud over me during what should have been my first joyful months of motherhood. You reinforced my fears that the reason that the course didn't work for me was my fault, took no responsibility for what I took away from the course and I'm not sure the aims of recounting of your perfect birth story in the email but I'm sure you can imagine the effect. 

I understand that you do not tell women what to do but suggestion is a very powerful thing to a vulnerable pregnant woman. You quote 1,000s of women giving you positive feedback but what if there are 1,000s of others that feel the same as I do but are too traumatised or ashamed to tell their Wise Hippo teacher. I have asked some of the people that I know did the course around the time that I did, with different teachers and although some had positive experiences they almost all said that the course offered a romanticised idealistic birth. Others, like me, were traumatised and had an overriding feeling that they had failed at birth, which I now know is utter nonsense. 

Yes, you do talk about different outcomes in the book, but during the sessions we only watched perfectly calm water births and were encouraged not to listen to 'negative' birth stories. I now know that they are just birth stories. I remember Sue* saying that women who have had a 'bad' experience sensationalise it, add to the tale and make it sound all the more 'awful'. The thing is, although long and tiring the only thing I look back on negatively is the hypnobirthing, or specific elements at least. Not the doctors and midwives who had to persuade me to lie down so that they could save my baby's life because I had it so deeply ingrained from the course that lying on my back was the worst thing that I could do. You say that you don't talk about the drugs because you're not medically trained to do so, but don't you think that by saying nothing about them you are putting the emphasis heavily on a drug-free birth? 

You say that you're empowering women to make their own decisions but it almost suggests that the doctors and midwives have some sort of hidden agenda. Refusing the induction I felt really empowered, like I was beating the system and as a result would have the natural labour that the doctors were conspiring against but the wise hippo course made me believe I could have. I now feel incredibly stupid. 

So, what did I expect? I expected you to take responsibility, to be alarmed and to say that you will take action to make sure that women do not feel this way. It makes sense that you would defend it of course, you have built a thriving business on teaching these techniques. 

To answer your question, we were not offered a session on induction (I double checked with the other person on the course).  

Would you mind if I made our letters public, I feel like people could really learn from both sides of this story. I will of course change Sue's name if requested? 

Nicola 

SHE REPLIED

Hi Nicola

I am sorry that my email upset you as that was not my intention. I am also sorry also that we haven’t had the chance to speak about this as the written word can so often be misconstrued.

I did not intend for you to feel that it was your fault that the course didn’t work for you because actually with the ‘the right birth on the day’ approach there is no one right way for it to work.

I thought I would address this statement first of all:

“So, what did I expect? I expected you to take responsibility, to be alarmed and to say that you will take action to make sure that women do not feel this way. It makes sense that you would defend it of course, you have built a thriving business on teaching these techniques.”Of course it deeply concerns me that you and maybe others feel this way, but my reasons for sharing with you the philosophy of the programme and how it is structured, was to show you that I have worked hard to ensure that women do not feel that they have failed at birth. That they understand that what they are learning is about trusting their instincts and making decisions that are right for them. I am not abdicating responsibility for women’s feelings what I am saying though is that each woman must take responsibility for the choices that they make and I believe that is what we teach. The Wise Hippo Birthing Programme is not just about a set of techniques it is about women and their partners exploring what is right for them. We do not tell women what they should do.

My purpose for clarifying each point that you made was also an attempt to reassure you that I took the concerns you were sharing with me into consideration when writing the programme. The ‘right birth on the day’ approach acknowledges that life sometimes throws curve balls and that birth plans need to change. We don’t dictate a prescribed way of birthing which is why during the birth planning process we suggest that women research and ask questions to make sure that they know what is right for them.

I am very sad that you feel like you have failed. I am admin on a hypnobirth board on the Babycentre forum, and it was hearing women say that they felt like they had failed, that got me to question traditional hypnobirthing which is focussed on a natural birth without drugs. It is why I have written a programme that is focussed on having ‘the right birth on the day’ instead. 

I cannot understand how when we speak about making choices that are right for you, asking questions and making informed decisions, appreciating that life sometimes throws curved balls which mean clients may have to completely change their plans for birth, accepting drugs, accepting intervention or needing a c-section, that this can imply that we believe that there is only one way to birth which can be failed at. 

I would be very interested to find out from you how I can say this more clearly though.

Please also ask the women that you mention to make contact with me as I will be happy to discuss this with them too. 

I accept that there may be other women who have not shared their disappointment with me, but what I do know of most of our instructors is that they remain in contact with their clients up to and beyond their births, which is why we are able to get such a lot of feedback. Not all of these births go to plan as I have explained.

Sue gathers feedback from her clients and once again I appreciate not everyone will share difficult feedback, but not all of those clients had a perfect birth experience, many of them had to make difficult decisions along the way, but did not feel that they were set up by the programme.

I shared my story because you said a midwife had told you that in her experience no first time mum was successful with hypnobirthing. As I’ve explained The Wise Hippo doesn’t not view success as being a natural birth without drugs, but as this midwife clearly did I shared my birth story to prove that it is possible to achieve that as a first time mum. 

We show calm births because birth images and footage of women using conventional drugs are widely available and  footage of women birthing using breathing techniques is not readily available.

We used to show a birth of a woman who had to transfer in from a home birth, and then her talking straight after the birth with Tamara about how it had got dramatic due to shoulder dystocia, and we had more complaints than we had good feedback about sharing that because in the main women felt that it went against us saying not to listen to difficult birth stories. 

I of course know that suggestion is a powerful thing but I do not believe that we are planting the suggestion that birth is going to be perfect, I believe that we are planting the suggestion that birth can be what is right on the day even when it doesn’t go to plan.  

I have asked Sue about whether she tells her clients that they CANNOT lay on their back and she said that she teaches as the programmes states, which is that an upright and forward position is generally best, but that women should always trust their instincts and get into positions that are right for her.

With regards to this “I remember Sue saying that women who have had a 'bad' experience sensationalise it, add to the tale and make it sound all the more 'awful'.” I again asked Sue about this and she said that she would not say this. I hope you can appreciate that this puts me in a “she said, she said” position. I have however known Sue for many years and she cares greatly about the women she supports. The reason we suggest not listening to difficult birth stories is that as you say suggestion is very powerful and it isn’t useful due to the fear it can engender to have lots of difficult stories in your head. This in no way negates the feelings that any woman has about her birth.

I think many women choose our classes because they want to explore options for not having pain free drugs. However, we make it very clear that it is up to each woman to explore her own options in relation to that. As I have said previously we are not medically trained to discuss the drugs.

We have a huge number of midwives that teach The Wise Hippo Birthing Programme privately and over 100 NHS midwives teaching across 8 different Trusts. The reason that they have chosen to teach this programme is because we do not set the doctors and midwives up as the enemy. We certainly do not suggest that they have a hidden agenda and in fact my recommendation is always to look for a win:win:win, a  win for mum, win for baby and a win for the medical team because their highest priority is to ensure mum and baby’s safety. I am sure you will agree, that if these midwives and their Trusts felt that we were suggesting that doctors and midwives were conspiring against women with regards to achieving the birth that they want, that they would not choose to teach it. 

I have asked Sue* about the induction session and she says that it is clearly stated on her website that she offers these sessions but she waits for her clients to ask her if they need any further support. This is a personal choice that instructors make as some feel it is pushy to mention other sessions that they offer during the birthing programme. My main reason for mentioning it is that you appeared to believe that we were against induction and I was pointing out that if that were the case that I would not have written a preparing for induction session.

If you feel it is useful to share these emails publicly then I have no objection to that. I don’t think it is appropriate for you to name Sue* however.

I ask from you that I can do the same as I will use your concerns to reiterate these important points for our instructors in their teaching and I will write a blog about it to clarify The Wise Hippo approach to birthing. 

I appreciate that you may once again see this as me defending my programme rather than seeing things from your perspective. It does upset me that you did not interpret The Wise Hippo teachings in the way I have described. I feel that what I have said is very clearly shown in The Wise Hippo Birthing Programme workbook and I believe that we are not teaching a prescribed way of birthing, but opening woman and their partner’s minds to the possibility that it is ok to trust their instincts and follow what feels right for them based on what is happening during her unique and individual birth.

My intention is absolutely for women to feel that they had the right birth on the day and not that they failed at birth. Sometimes the right birth on the day means a perfect births and sometimes it means handing their birth over to the medical team because birth needs support. I wrote the programme this way to help avoid women feeling like they had failed at birth.

But as this message was not clear enough for you I will ask again that if you can let me know how you believe that I can show these points more clearly in the programme that would be very useful because then I can help make sure that other women do not feel this way.

Best wishes

Dany


I REPLIED 

Hi Dany, 

Hope you're well.  I'll keep this brief (because I have a baby wriggling on my lap). Absolutely the written word can be dangerous, my phone number is at the bottom of all my e-mails should you wish to talk. I don't know if we'll find a solution but I've put my experience into a  blog post now, I hope that this outlines how the course influenced how I felt a bit more clearly. I've also published the letters but changed Sue's name as requested. 

It's a tricky one isn't it, Sue said too that I was the first person in her nine years of teaching that felt this way. As it turns out, I'm not alone, I've had lots of messages from people that feel the same way that I do but I'm sure you can understand that they don't want to go back to their teacher to talk about it. Lots of the women that I have spoken to just buried the bad experience, or worse, said that they obviously didn't do it right/practice enough. Blamed themselves. Of course a percentage feel that it worked, and that is truly brilliant. I have friends that swear by it and I am careful what I say around them. 

Agreed, the 'she said, she said' is  not helping anyone, although I stand by my concerns. I do take issue with inductions being covered separately; the need for one, especially for a first birth is very common, for a host of reasons and by covering this separately you might be de-normalising it, not to mention the extra cost. I couldn't find any mention of the course anywhere on any of Sue's sites. Screen grabs attached. 

It's great that the NHS are teaching the course, the midwives will come from a different perspective, I think their wealth of experience of different types of birth will really help in making the course work for everyone. They'll also have the medical knowledge to talk about drugs and inductions. Creating a really balanced course for everyone. It seems like the perfect solution, I only wish my trust offered it!

I hope that you find my blog post balanced, do let me know if you have any concerns. 


Best wishes 

Nicola


SHE REPLIED


Hi Nicola

Thank you for your email. 

I will have a read later today and let you know my thoughts. 

There is something I'm interested to know though. 

All of the women you mention have they said they did The Wise Hippo or Hypnobirthing. 

I'm not going to get into another debate about whether The Wise Hippo 'works' for everyone, as I do not see 'the right birth on the day' as something that works. I also don't see types of births as positive or negative because of this. 

However, it is important whether or not everyone of these women have used The Wise Hippo. As I said before if they have I would be very happy to speak with them. 

Best wishes 

Dany



I REPLIED


Hi Dany,

Sorry for the delay, yes I have three friends that I was talking to this week who did the course around the same time as me, one with Sue who had a good experience (but can understand why I feel as I do) and two with different teachers who both feel to different degrees that the course gave them unrealistic expectations. I have also had private messages from people on social media that I don't know saying they did the course and had similar post-birth feelings.

I've screengrabbed on of the commenters on my latest post who makes some points that I agree with around the videos being second time mothers. Screen grab attached. 

Best

Nicola 


SHE REPLIED


Thank you. What about all of the other women you mention? 

I have just posted on our pregnant client group and asked if they could give me comments on 'the right birth on the day' approach. 

Also, birth stories from first time mums to find out if my story is really that rare. I know from my own clients it wasn't but I'm interested to hear from our instructors clients. 

Although of course we do get positive stories coming in every day and they are not all 'perfect' births. In fact we've just posted a great csection 'right birth on the day' story. 

Best wishes 

Dany

I REPLIED


Hi Dany, 

Some did, some didn't. I'm not sure it matters because if the people in my immediate friendship group (that did the course**) feel this way and women that did other hypnobirthing courses feel this way there is still cause for alarm.

You might be preaching to the choir asking your own groups. I know that the first thing that I did post birth was to unfollow anything that would remind me of the Wise Hippo. I also think that in pregnancy I had a very different view and would have been able to recite that the wise hippo will help 'whatever turn my birthing takes'. The reality was very different. 

I know that of the women that I know, the ones that had a good experience felt very grateful to their teacher and wrote extensive feedback, the ones that didn't wanted to burn the book. I understand this might make it difficult to get feedback from the other women that feel as I do. The other reason is the feeling that they 'just didn't do it right' and are embarrassed to tell their teacher that they have similar feelings to mine because they 'didn't practice enough'.

I don't think that your experience is rare and I absolutely don't doubt that you get hoardes of positive feedback but I don't think my experience is either. 

Best 

Nicola 

SHE REPLIED

Hi Nicola 

I do think it matters which programme women attended because other hypnobirthing programmes specifically  teach about achieving a natural birth without drugs. 

The Wise Hippo does not. 

Traditional hypnobirthing from Marie Mongan did say that if you prepare in her way there is no reason why you can't achieve that.  

The Wise Hippo does not. In fact I specifically say that the type of birth is not guaranteed as life throws curved balls sometimes and that no amount of preparation can stop as that's sheer bad luck. 

No I don't believe I was lucky in my birth. Yes I do believe that some women are unlucky. 

Tamara believes that she didn't need to be induced and that is her right to feel that way. 

You chose in my view to hear that if you prepare in this way that it would guarantee you a perfect birth. 

I have never said that. 

I specifically asked women who didn't have perfect births to share. Many chose induction, interventions and csections. They all said that what they had learned enabled them to make calms informed decisions. 

I believe I make it very clear for women to trust their instincts and do what is right for them. 

Best wishes

Dany 


I REPLIED 


Hi Dany, 


Sorry perhaps I wasn't clear, what I meant was that if out of the people that I know that did the wise hippo feel this way and people that did other courses feel this way perhaps the distinction that you feel is there is not coming across to all of us. 

I'm not sure this exchange is helping my post-birth mental health (still a bit rocky it turns out!) so I'll continue to share my story in the hope that it reaches the right people and hope that over time you'll come to understand my point of view and try to make sure that it doesn't happen to others. 

The line about choice makes me angry and I'm really trying to be measured and productive, believe me. My blog post tries to explain why I interpreted the course in this way. It wasn't a conscious choice, it was the impression that I took from it and others have said the same.

Of course it is Tamara's and every woman's right to make the choices that they do but you choose how to portray induction in the book and by using that example as one of the few mentions of induction you are planting certain seeds. 

I don't have the mental energy to get into any further debate although my mind is whirring because I really don't think you'll understand. 

One of my Instagram commenters said this though: "my friend refused induction and went on to have a stillbirth". Even if you disagree with everything I've said, please just do everything you can to never let this happen to a Wise Hippo client. 

Nicola 

SHE REPLIED

I agree I think this ongoing conversation is not useful for either of us and I believe that we are going to have to agree to disagree. 

With regards to your last statement we make it VERY CLEAR to make decisions that are right for you.

No-one is ever told to refuse inductions or indeed refuse any medical intervention. It is suggested that they make the effort to understand why it is the right decision to make.

I have just posted on our Wise Hippo page about this and I have made a point of saying that it is up to everyone to take responsibility for their own birth. I will most likely blog more about it when I have the time.

As you say you will share your message in a way that you feel is right for you and I will do the same.

Best wishes

Dany






Hi Nicola

It is a shame because we are absolutely on the same page. 

I will be sharing a link to your blog within a blog of my own as I will be giving my views on what you have said.

Best wishes

Dany


YOU CAN SEE THE POST ON HER FACEBOOK PAGE HERE


*My course leader's name has been changed.
**I added this in to be clearer

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2 comments

  1. 'Perfect births' seems a pretty loaded comment from Dany... and a good example of the implied meaning (suggestion) you speak about.

    I am 31 weeks.. scared about labour of course.. but basically approaching it with a 'no plan is the only plan' kind of attitude. Thanks for posting - I found it really useful. And I love your blog.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you and good luck with it all, a laid back attitude should stand you in good stead! I wish I'd been more relaxed! x

      Delete

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